I know it's taboo. But, with the current recession, it seems like everyone talks openly about money these days, and so I figure, "why be different"? I'll talk REAL figures with you.
Our consultation with an adoption agency this week pretty much sums it up. $30,000-$40,000 to adopt. This is a domestic adoption we are talking about - not an international adoption, which typically cost much more. Let's break this down so you can see exactly where this cost comes from: $25k to the agency for finding the birthmother, matching to us (the adoptive parents), screening the birthmother, walking us through the system, paperwork, etc etc etc. There is a LOT involved. PLUS we'll pay for the Home Study (when the social worker comes to visit), the birthmother expenses (if necessary), the lawyers/legal fees, travel (if necessary), and other various fees such as social workers, interstate adoption costs (if applicable), etc etc. You get the idea. There are a lot of fees tucked away here and there.
This is the most disturbing part. Several people - agencies, fellow adoptive parents, etc - liken the cost to adopt much like buying a car. Most people finance their cars. So, in the same way people finance their car, people finance their adoption. So, they say, "If you will invest in your car, why wouldn't you invest in the life of a child?"
I just don't buy this. First, I've never spent that much on a car (though I have financed cars). Second, I can't help but think many things about this comparison, such as "well, I might finance a car - but I don't have to put diapers on a car and feed a car, and put my car in day care, and I don't have to put my car through college, and I don't have to worry about damaging my car's emotions for life because i worked too much to pay off said car or wanted to put my car in the best schools, etc."
Nonetheless, we will continue to pursue all options and will put our faith in God. If it is meant to be, we will find a way to come up with the funds to do this. I'm spending lots of time (between packing boxes) to research some adoption grants, etc. It's been an interesting adventure. If you know of any resources, we are open to hearing about them. Thank you!
One last thing - and I'll keep it short, because this blog entry is getting long. But, something spoke to me in church this morning - and I wanted to share. I think it's funny how just when I'm starting to get discouraged, God puts His hands back into the situation to make sure I remember that He's in control.
This morning during the sermon, our pastor said, "Jesus was the first adopter". John 1:12-13 says, "Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God--children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God." A friend sent me this link, and I invite you to view this video and ask yourself: "Are we not ALL Children of God?" Every single one of us have been adopted by Jesus, if we have received Him. http://www.thirdday.com/adopted
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