We have received our Adoptive Parent Home Study Packet! The saying on the front is "Mercy gives hope...and hope is everything to a child"
This saying reminds us of why we are doing this. There is a child out there with hope of finding his or her Forever Family, and God has planned for us to be the family for that child. It's something bigger than we can imagine, as only God can do. It's pretty amazing.
We have a VERY long road ahead of us....this home study packet is a 2 inch 3-ring binder of things to do. No kidding. We have to do the local, state and FBI criminal background checks, complete with fingerprints. Then there are the refererences, the statement of guardianship (should something happen to us), the home study visits, complete with fire department inspections, the 51 page personal profile.... no joke... - 51 pages. Then there is the Child Characteristics checklist, which is a 5 page document with 2 columns on each page (each column with about 50 questions) of what we will/will not consider. WOW!! You think you know yourself. The emotional part wants to check the boxes that we'll consider any child that God has planned for us....no matter what! The practical part says, "Hold on a minute! You know NOTHING about that - you even had to Google it to know what it means! How do you intend to deal with a child in that situation?!" So, I'm sure we'll learn a lot about ourselves and each other as we prayfully consider each line of this section of the home study. The financial and medical documents are only 2 pages long! Wahoo! But, then, there are the verifications for each of those. Well, nothing is going to be easy.
I would normally feel overwhelmed as I look at this binder, but our new BFF, Deb Athans at All God's Children will walk us through each step of this, and she has already been in touch with us to set up a time to talk about the first step. Thank goodness for Deb!!
Next step: Call Deb back.
More to follow.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
Paid
"Big" bill #1 paid. It hurt only a little. However, we almost immediately got news that we are authorized to start the home study process (yes - frantic cleaning in the house ensued)!!!
Aside from that; here is what we can expect:
Oregon has strict requirements. So, in order to meet them, we have to take a foster/adopt parent training.
Then comes the home study: minimum of 4 contact: individual and couple interviews and at least one visit in our home, resulting in at least six hours total.
Then, there are the Post Placement Reports: quarterly visits with letters from the social worker.
Oh - then the family photo album. Connie doesn't know this yet, but she'll be assigned to this. This is for the committe to select a child for us, and then it goes to the foster family once we are selected.
The requirements for the family album are:
The album should be geared toward the child(ren) and include the following:
Three notarized copies of the home study agency license
Three notarized copies of the social worker’s license
One original family photo album
Wow. We have a lot of stuff left to do!! This is pretty exciting. Cannot wait to meet our child and see who God has in mind for us.
Aside from that; here is what we can expect:
Oregon has strict requirements. So, in order to meet them, we have to take a foster/adopt parent training.
Then comes the home study: minimum of 4 contact: individual and couple interviews and at least one visit in our home, resulting in at least six hours total.
Then, there are the Post Placement Reports: quarterly visits with letters from the social worker.
Oh - then the family photo album. Connie doesn't know this yet, but she'll be assigned to this. This is for the committe to select a child for us, and then it goes to the foster family once we are selected.
The requirements for the family album are:
The album should be geared toward the child(ren) and include the following:
- A letter addressed to the child(ren)
- Pictures
- each member of the family
- family activities
- family gatherings
- pets
- the home
- the child’s room
- Captions identifying who/what is in the picture
Three notarized copies of the home study agency license
Three notarized copies of the social worker’s license
One original family photo album
Wow. We have a lot of stuff left to do!! This is pretty exciting. Cannot wait to meet our child and see who God has in mind for us.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Cha-Ching!
I first want to apologize for no details recently. I really have no updates – so no details to tell. However, I thought I’d drop a little note here to let you know answers to some of the FAQ’s we’ve been hearing.
We are approaching our first deadline for the first big payment. I know it’s typically rude to talk about finances, but, everyone asks, and I don’t mind sharing. Besides, in the adoption world, the big big deal is the cost. So, here goes. By Sept 24, we owe $4,025. That is $2,500 for the agency fee plus $1,575 for the home study fee. We get a discount for living in Ohio. (Don’t ask me why, I have no idea, I just figure it’s great!) The home study fee for other states is $1,750.
Four thousand dollars. It’s a huge step. We paid the $300 application fee, which is also non-refundable, of course. But, this fee is more than 10X that much….and once we pay our fees to the agency; this is the one we are going with. What’s the big deal, you ask? Well, we have been approached by many people about other opportunities to adopt. However, none of them are solid or they have fallen through in one way or another. We have prayed for unborn babies’ lives to be saved, we have been asked if we’d be interested in fostering, and we’ve been approached by a friend of a friend who knows someone who is in a situation….you get the idea. Once you tell the world you want to adopt a child, the world wants to help a child find a home. It’s a wonderful feeling and amazing to watch. However, it can build up a lot of anxiety. You find yourself looking at pregnant women a different way. You hear about horrible stories every day. Teenage mothers are rarely the ones who give up their children for adoption these days….it’s typically women who are pregnant via some type of unwanted situation or a mistake they’ve made (sexual assault or affairs, etc). I’ve prayed for more strangers in the past months – women I’ve seen on the street, in the store, heard a story about in passing, etc. But, I’m sorry, I digress from the big deal.
Here’s the big deal: Most home studies are interchangeable. Once you get a home study completed, you are eligible for any child that is ready to be placed. However, there are always restrictions and red tape involved in such a simple statement. That red tape applies when you are dealing with cross-border situations. The state of Oregon only allows All God’s Children International (AGCI) to perform the home study. When a private agency does the home study, not all public agencies (or other private agencies) will accept it. In other words: If we were going through the state of Ohio, we’d have a social worker assigned by the state of Ohio. He/She would do a home study, and then we could adopt from anywhere in Ohio – whether it’s from the Ohio foster system, a friend of a friend who knows someone, a teenage mother, an agency who is seeking us, etc. However, Oregon says it must be done through AGCI for this program. And, since we feel that God wants us to walk through this program, we are using AGCI. This means that friend of a friend or the pregnant teen….those doors are closed to us, unless we want to get an Ohio home study completed also. Our funds do not allow for several home studies, so we are choosing one and sticking with it.
Speaking of funds, let’s go back to the elephant in the room. We are commonly asked, “What is the cost to adopt?” I’ve asked some fellow adoptive parents. I’ve heard everything from FREE to $46,000. No kidding! That is a crazy range. “Free” was from the foster to adopt program – the child was fostered for a while, and then eventually adopted. $46,000 was a child from China. The typical US (domestic) adoption costs about $20,000. Wow. That’s still nothing to sneeze at. I can’t believe there are babies born every day who need a home, and adoptive parents just crying out for a child…but in order to do this, they have to come up with 20 grand. We are facing a challenge of coming up with the money. We want to pay for the process in cash. So, we are grateful that AGCI has broken down the payment situation so that fees are due little by little. We don’t want to get a child and deal with the financial stress of that on top of dealing with the payments of a loan. It’s stressful just to consider that idea. So, cash we pay – right out of our savings account. We may explore some grant opportunities, but not loan situations. Debt is something we avoid anyway, and besides, how would you word that when you are discussing that loan with your spouse, “We are almost done paying off the kid!” Hmm….doesn’t sound right. However, these are things couples talk about every day.
So, we approach our deadline. The agency was kind enough to give us an extension. We wanted to wait until Rob finished his tests, which he has done. (He passed!!) Anyway, the agency granted us an extension to complete the first payment as well as some paperwork…so everything is due on Sept 24. I can’t believe the end of September is right around the corner. But, around the corner it is, and we are prepared. Financially and emotionally.
Thank you to all of you for your endless love & support.
We are approaching our first deadline for the first big payment. I know it’s typically rude to talk about finances, but, everyone asks, and I don’t mind sharing. Besides, in the adoption world, the big big deal is the cost. So, here goes. By Sept 24, we owe $4,025. That is $2,500 for the agency fee plus $1,575 for the home study fee. We get a discount for living in Ohio. (Don’t ask me why, I have no idea, I just figure it’s great!) The home study fee for other states is $1,750.
Four thousand dollars. It’s a huge step. We paid the $300 application fee, which is also non-refundable, of course. But, this fee is more than 10X that much….and once we pay our fees to the agency; this is the one we are going with. What’s the big deal, you ask? Well, we have been approached by many people about other opportunities to adopt. However, none of them are solid or they have fallen through in one way or another. We have prayed for unborn babies’ lives to be saved, we have been asked if we’d be interested in fostering, and we’ve been approached by a friend of a friend who knows someone who is in a situation….you get the idea. Once you tell the world you want to adopt a child, the world wants to help a child find a home. It’s a wonderful feeling and amazing to watch. However, it can build up a lot of anxiety. You find yourself looking at pregnant women a different way. You hear about horrible stories every day. Teenage mothers are rarely the ones who give up their children for adoption these days….it’s typically women who are pregnant via some type of unwanted situation or a mistake they’ve made (sexual assault or affairs, etc). I’ve prayed for more strangers in the past months – women I’ve seen on the street, in the store, heard a story about in passing, etc. But, I’m sorry, I digress from the big deal.
Here’s the big deal: Most home studies are interchangeable. Once you get a home study completed, you are eligible for any child that is ready to be placed. However, there are always restrictions and red tape involved in such a simple statement. That red tape applies when you are dealing with cross-border situations. The state of Oregon only allows All God’s Children International (AGCI) to perform the home study. When a private agency does the home study, not all public agencies (or other private agencies) will accept it. In other words: If we were going through the state of Ohio, we’d have a social worker assigned by the state of Ohio. He/She would do a home study, and then we could adopt from anywhere in Ohio – whether it’s from the Ohio foster system, a friend of a friend who knows someone, a teenage mother, an agency who is seeking us, etc. However, Oregon says it must be done through AGCI for this program. And, since we feel that God wants us to walk through this program, we are using AGCI. This means that friend of a friend or the pregnant teen….those doors are closed to us, unless we want to get an Ohio home study completed also. Our funds do not allow for several home studies, so we are choosing one and sticking with it.
Speaking of funds, let’s go back to the elephant in the room. We are commonly asked, “What is the cost to adopt?” I’ve asked some fellow adoptive parents. I’ve heard everything from FREE to $46,000. No kidding! That is a crazy range. “Free” was from the foster to adopt program – the child was fostered for a while, and then eventually adopted. $46,000 was a child from China. The typical US (domestic) adoption costs about $20,000. Wow. That’s still nothing to sneeze at. I can’t believe there are babies born every day who need a home, and adoptive parents just crying out for a child…but in order to do this, they have to come up with 20 grand. We are facing a challenge of coming up with the money. We want to pay for the process in cash. So, we are grateful that AGCI has broken down the payment situation so that fees are due little by little. We don’t want to get a child and deal with the financial stress of that on top of dealing with the payments of a loan. It’s stressful just to consider that idea. So, cash we pay – right out of our savings account. We may explore some grant opportunities, but not loan situations. Debt is something we avoid anyway, and besides, how would you word that when you are discussing that loan with your spouse, “We are almost done paying off the kid!” Hmm….doesn’t sound right. However, these are things couples talk about every day.
So, we approach our deadline. The agency was kind enough to give us an extension. We wanted to wait until Rob finished his tests, which he has done. (He passed!!) Anyway, the agency granted us an extension to complete the first payment as well as some paperwork…so everything is due on Sept 24. I can’t believe the end of September is right around the corner. But, around the corner it is, and we are prepared. Financially and emotionally.
Thank you to all of you for your endless love & support.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Waiting...
Not much to post. Just waiting. I hear that song come on the radio "While I'm Waiting" by John Waller. You may have heard it featured on the movie with "Fireproof" with Kirk Cameron. Well, that' us. Waiting.
Rob has his testing at the end of August. It's a lot of pressure, and I'm proud of him for coming so far with this. We have to wait for the "Child Abuse" search to be complete before anything happens anyway. We are told that takes 90 days. We are about 10 days or so into that wait. Ugh.
Anyway, it's a lot of waiting around here at the DeVol household. We are making the best of it. This weekend: Ropes Course, next week: business trip to Houston, following week: Climbing lessons. It's not a boring wait, but frustrating, indeed.
Here are the lyrics to the song. I sing it daily...at the top of my lungs:
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
Rob has his testing at the end of August. It's a lot of pressure, and I'm proud of him for coming so far with this. We have to wait for the "Child Abuse" search to be complete before anything happens anyway. We are told that takes 90 days. We are about 10 days or so into that wait. Ugh.
Anyway, it's a lot of waiting around here at the DeVol household. We are making the best of it. This weekend: Ropes Course, next week: business trip to Houston, following week: Climbing lessons. It's not a boring wait, but frustrating, indeed.
Here are the lyrics to the song. I sing it daily...at the top of my lungs:
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Signed, Sealed, Delivered....well, in the mail, anyway....
We had a STACK of papers to get notarized. Our friend Kelli was gracious enough to offer up her notary service and we had a little signing party. It was fun to get it all done and catch up with our friends at the same time.
The papers are all "in the mail" as they say...or rather in the UPS, to be honest. Per the fancy UPS tracking device, they will arrive on time next week and then we are off to the next step:
The Ohio Child Abuse Checks. I don't know much about it, but I do know that it takes 90 days, and we can't meet with our social worker until this is complete.
Sorry the updates are not so exciting these days. Imagine how we feel! Exciting announcement, then waiting forever. It's like a broken roller coaster. But, we are still pretty excited. So, maybe it's like getting stuck at the top of the hill on the roller coaster. Which, I would think would be pretty fun.
I think the most exciting part is watching others get excited for us. My mother-in-law and I were garage-sale-ing (yes- that IS a verb!) the other day, and she was wishing she knew age/gender/etc of the child we'll get because she's ready to get toys, clothes, etc. She did talk me into buying one of those car window screens that block the sun. It was $1. I already use it. Good thinkin, Connie! Thanks! :)
That's all for today. Have a great weekend.
The papers are all "in the mail" as they say...or rather in the UPS, to be honest. Per the fancy UPS tracking device, they will arrive on time next week and then we are off to the next step:
The Ohio Child Abuse Checks. I don't know much about it, but I do know that it takes 90 days, and we can't meet with our social worker until this is complete.
Sorry the updates are not so exciting these days. Imagine how we feel! Exciting announcement, then waiting forever. It's like a broken roller coaster. But, we are still pretty excited. So, maybe it's like getting stuck at the top of the hill on the roller coaster. Which, I would think would be pretty fun.
I think the most exciting part is watching others get excited for us. My mother-in-law and I were garage-sale-ing (yes- that IS a verb!) the other day, and she was wishing she knew age/gender/etc of the child we'll get because she's ready to get toys, clothes, etc. She did talk me into buying one of those car window screens that block the sun. It was $1. I already use it. Good thinkin, Connie! Thanks! :)
That's all for today. Have a great weekend.
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